Today, I was reading a book on paper for the first time in maybe a month. I had to stop at a word I did not recognise. Because I'm so used to using a Kindle, I tried to get the definition by pressing it. I had my finger on the word for a few seconds before I realised it was paper. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
Today, it was my wedding. Everyone showed up… except my fiancé. FML
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML
Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
Today, at my wedding, my husband's drunk friend admitted that the only reason my husband and I started dating was because he was dared. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
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