Monsieur 40 ans
Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML
Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML
Today, I was frustrated at work so to have fun, I wrote an email to myself saying that I was great and loved myself and should relax. I used all different colors and fonts. Instead of hitting "delete", I hit "print" without realizing. My manager got it out of the printer and put it on my desk. FML
Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML
Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML
Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. No one picked up. FML
Today, I had to listen to a girl who just came back from the bathroom, talk about the "gigantic massive dump" she took, and even held her hands up to show the size. FML
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