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cook34

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Cook34's favorite FMLs

By anonymous - 30/01/2010 00:08 - France

Today, I told my best friend I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years. He thought it would be funny to tell her I was going to propose to her that night. She showed up telling me how much she loves me and that when we get married how great it will be. FML

agreeclassic 38 162

vote type 1 7 111

Reddit

By syl - 11/02/2010 06:18 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

agreeclassic 25 336

vote type 1 5 235

Reddit

By muffingirl - 10/02/2010 12:30 - United Kingdom

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML

agreeclassic 29 829

vote type 1 8 161

Reddit

Class act

By LoveStruck- - 10/02/2010 07:29 - United States

Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML

agreeclassic 38 825

vote type 1 5 749

Reddit

No smoke, no fire

By justme - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was about to take a dump when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML

agreeclassic 41 068

vote type 1 5 295

Reddit