ftsita

Today, while laying out, I kept feeling something misty, like a spray bottle. Curious as to what it was since it kept coming, I looked up, only to see the painters were peeing over the side of the house, and the heavy breeze was turning their piss into a refreshing mist for me. FML

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML