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JohnTheMermaid

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Saturday 24 May 1997

Johnthemermaid

I thrive off other people's pain

Johnthemermaid -

Johnthemermaid -

Johnthemermaid

lovers5201

BirgitHerr...

Unodead

justinsawy...

windsaber0...

tchoupi26

crashleyan...

BoneCollec...

BlueAlpaca

ninjakitty...

Maniaphili...

ragnarok15...

Hop6e

EvilTurtle

Johnthemermaid

Johnthemermaid

manlyman - 05/04/2009 13:32 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

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sydysyd - 21/11/2010 23:43 - United States

Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML

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Check this out

laurenraeee - - United States

Today, I saw a video of me from over the weekend, naked, pretending to be a duck. What the fuck happened that night? FML

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sickkid - 23/11/2009 18:05 - United States

Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML

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Anonymous - 07/10/2009 23:12 - United States

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

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